Once upon a time there was a young woman called Mona Chopra who wanted to become an actress. When she was cast in a minor role in the YRF production Dil Bole Hadippa, starring Shahid Kapoor and Rani Mukherji, she thought her time had come. It was 2009 and Mona Darling would surely take it by storm! Until then, all she’d done was to appear in films with titles like Beeper and Naughty Boy (umm!!). So as Miss Chandigarh, Mona darling strutted around in minimal clothing and flaunted her long, long legs. But the film bombed at box office and Mona’s hopes of becoming the blockbuster girl were dashed.
Determined to make a name for herself, Mona decided to take a leaf out of the ye olde Bollywood legends’ books. And so, in the tradition of superstars like Meena Kumari and Dilip Kumar, Mona gave herself a new name: Sherlyn.
This, sadly, didn’t seem to be working as well for her as it did for the yesteryear actors. (It couldn’t be the quality of the films that she was picking, of course.) And so, Sherlyn found herself not only out of work but also unable to afford the B-grade Bollywood parties that are must-attends for wannabes and hopefuls. All she had then to connect her to the world beyond her little apartment was a Twitter account. So, armed with the power of the internet, Sherlyn began to build a reputation. She posted narcissistic pictures of herself in very little or no clothes. Some may think this was debauched behaviour, but keep in mind that at this time young Sherlyn was — to use that much-hated Bollywood word — a “struggler”. Where would she get a full outfit from, pray tell?
Soon enough, Mona Chopra aka Sherlyn became a Twitter sensation. Several people (mostly men) googled the almost nude pictures she had religiously uploaded to her Twitter account. And just like that, lo and behold, Miss Chopra had the name and fame of which she had always dreamt. Next step: Bollywood.
One day a genius plan occurred to her. Boldly going forth where no Indian model has gone before, Sherlyn wrote an email to Hugh Heffner telling him she would love to pose for Playboy. Unfortunately, he didn’t seem particularly eager. But Sherlyn persisted and adapting the words wise man called Johnnie Walker who had said “Keep Walking”, Sherlyn kept emailing. It paid off. Sherlyn Chopra became the first Indian cover girl for Playboy magazine in 2012.
One international “achievement” is enough to make you The Babe in Bollywood (ask Freida Pinto). Since the work was still not pouring in, she offered herself to the animal rights’ organisation PETA. She spoke about condoms and how they cannot be used by dogs.
And then, finally, Sherlyn was offered a film! Now she can say, with pride and without any clothing on her torso, that she is the solo heroine film in Kamasutra 3D. No doubt the plot will make maximum use of her thespian talents.
Here’s the best news. She’s going to host Splitsvilla on MTV and thanks to Indian televison’s need to uphold the moral standards of our ancient culture, the channel will have to pay for a wardrobe. We can now hope and pray that she and her clothes will never be parted again.